1) If you
have little girls already, perhaps you have already seen Princess and the Frog.
I point this out only to note that if a Disney Princess can say “mucus” with a
straight face – I am sure you can too.
2) No one
like to be the bearer of bad news… and no matter how much your wife may seem to
enjoy it sometimes – she doesn’t either. The more you make her say “no” the
more frustrated she gets… the more frustrated she gets, the easier it is for
her to say no.
3) How
frustrating is it to be in a conversation with someone who has no clue what you
are talking about? It gets even worse when you know they are shaking their head
in agreement with no clue what they are agreeing to… Do I really need to say
more – learn it! More than just what phase 3 means – NFP is a team sport and if
you are the only one on the team that knows the rules the game it can get
frustrating quickly. Just as important, when you know the rules you know when
she is making up her own.
4) Find the bright side… Can there be an
upside to abstinence?!? It may be hard to find, but think of it from her
perspective. Not only does she have to deal with abstinence, but she has to
deal with your whining. Distract each other in other ways.
5) All those
experts who write those annoying books she always wants you to read are right
about one point; communication is the key – and NFP is all about communication.
Now it may be hard for some to grasp, but the communication I have in mind is
more than “Is it phase 3 yet?” Get over the sex part of intimacy, at least for
a couple weeks a month. This is the perfect time to force her to pretend to
like watching football… Quality time comes in all different forms (but remember
it’s a two way street, you may have to try to not to gouge your eyes out for an
episode of Glee from time to time…)
6) We all
know how quickly gambling can get out of control, and except for a select few
it typically doesn’t end with outcome we were hoping for. Same holds true in
our world of NFP. We have been known to say “we’re close enough to phase 3” but
we also have 7 children. Enough said? Close enough is only close enough if you
have an empty bassinet laying around.
7) NFP – the
Navy Seals of birth control. Think about it, anybody can run to a doctor and
get some pill – NFP takes something more. The mental prowess and patience of a
sniper sitting quietly on target waiting for the target of opportunity. The
coordination; communication, between teammates, the training and knowledge to
understand the plan. The camaraderie,
the sacrifice, the commitment….
Alright, I did my best to make it sound masculine but the
reality is there is nothing more masculine than following God’s plan for love
and marriage. There is no greater way to show your love for your wife than to
know her, to understand how God created her, to be a partner in responsible parenthood….
In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.
Ephesians 5:28
